Homesick

Finally, the topic arises! Yes, it’s true. I’ve had, still do, I probably still will, get more homesick. To be honest, at this very moment I’m longing home and a bit emotional but I won’t say I’m homesick. I’ve had it and it’s not the same right now. Wow, I’m making it sound like it’s some kind of virus you can get! 😀

It’s actually scary because homesickness is no joke! Here are a few things I’ve come to learn about how to ease that very bad longing, homesick feeling….well kind of.

Look up! Stop walking with your head down and in your own thoughts. Take a moment to look at people, what they’re doing, where they’re going, how they act. Don’t you think that they also have lives and worries, stresses, going through things and they could also be homesick? You are not alone! It just seems that way because it’s you and your thoughts in your head that’s keeping you in this state. I know it’s hard to change your own feelings and thoughts sometimes, but what I try to do when I feel that sad, depressing feelings/thoughts arising, I immediately tell myself that today is going to be a good day. I’m not walking alone, God is with me, every step of the way! I shift my thoughts to the good things coming up in a week or two, and I talk to the people from home. But sometimes it’s easier said than done.

That leads me to…

Friends and Family. They can help you through any emotional state. Friends from where you are now and friends from home, and family!

I’m really lucky and appreciative of my family! We get along and we are very close. We talk everyday and I’m very grateful that they haven’t gotten tired of my calls yet! 😀 Talking to them recharges my emotional battery. It gives me courage to carry on and know that time doesn’t stand still, so enjoy as much as you can in the moment because they are the memories you make and take with you in life. I for one don’t want my experience here to only be memories of sadness and longing. – Thank you, my loving family. You give so much, do so much, and still support me through everything.

If I’m having a “homesick” day or two, I would rather want memories like those I’ve created with my family over the phone and….

Talking with a friend from home that makes me smile at my phone in a moment where just a few seconds earlier I wanted to cry. Or make me laugh out loud in public and resulting in people giving me weird stares. 😀 Making plans with each other in advance to look forward to when I come home for my holiday. – Thank you, my dear friend. You are an amazingly good friend and thank you for your company and all the laughter you bring to my life. 😀 (W – You know who you are.)

Then also having a special someone…

Who would call me on those days and try to make me laugh and even if he can’t, he never stops trying to make me feel better. Even plays me music through the phone while I prepare and cook dinner or simply lying on my bed, to give me courage to carry on and to let me know that tomorrow will be a better day. Reminding me that God is never ever far away. – Thank you for caring and loving me in a way I can’t even describe. (D – You know who you are.)

As for here in Kazan, to not saying no to new experiences and memories to be made! Firstly, by saying no, you are more likely to end up alone somewhere. Whether in your room or a coffee shop, your thoughts could drive you further into a bad state of homesickness. Secondly, you missed out on something that could have kept your mind too busy to miss home and giving you a change of perspective.

Like yesterday! My day started out with my brother calling me because it was his 21’st and my family decided to send him on a goose chase, needing to collect clues to get to his present. His first clue led him to phone me, where I needed to send him his next clue. Although I was missing home and wishing I could have been a part of his day in person, I was a part of his day through the phone. My mom video called me so that I could experience the whole goose chase with them. Of course, I couldn’t stay on the phone with them the whole day, so I was very grateful that I could have gone to something I decided to say yes to! Something that kept me too busy to be sad. An invitation to a music concert at a music college here in Kazan.

It was beautiful and I enjoyed the music so much. Having the orchestra right at your feet, seeing and hearing traditional instruments being played, was breath taking. I was sitting so close I couldn’t miss hearing a single note and so close I could see the sweat running down the conductor’s forehead as he passionately conducted. I am very thankful for the opportunity and memories, experiencing new things in Kazan all the time!

A short video of the 1^st orchestra’s rehearsal that played in the concert. The conductor is a professor at my University. (Kazan State Institute of Culture.)

Here’s also an audio clip of my favorite piece they played. I couldn’t video record at this moment but enjoy the music! I just absolutely loved it… How can anyone feel down when this play? It just makes you want to dance!

And my final conclusion to overcoming homesickness or anything close to it…

TALK TO THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU!

Chances are, they are going through the exact same emotional state as you, and if not, you can still actually end up having a conversation full of laughter. Just saying hello, how are you, and getting a giggle and starting a conversation could change your mood and theirs too.

And that is my conclusion of how to stay afloat in times of feeling lonely, sad, depressed, longing and missing home. No matter how far away from “home” you are!

Needless to say, my day started with me feeling alone but ended in me having a spring in my step, just being happy. I secretly think it was the music concert and the laughter filled conversations with my roommates that followed.

To anyone going through a time in their life, whether it being homesickness or any other thing causing you to feel down and blue, here is my prescription to you: Plenty of, “Today will be a great day” repeated to yourself and…just read these really good quotes because my fingers are getting tired of typing. 😀